In times of growing fear and division, such as those surrounding political uncertainty, it’s vital to mindfully choose our safety strategies—not only for our own well-being but also for the collective health of those around us. As another Trump administration looms on the horizon, many people are understandably anxious, sensing threats to social unity, rights, and the basic principles of democracy. This is a time when our nervous systems are likely on high alert, processing danger and safety in profoundly human ways.
From an interpersonal neurobiology (IPNB) perspective, two primary responses guide how we navigate perceived threats: threat detection and protection, and befriend and tend. Each of these responses represents different aspects of how our nervous system has evolved to keep us safe, and understanding them can help us choose strategies that protect our well-being while fostering the kind of community resilience we need now more than ever.
Threat Detection and Protection: Our Reactive Safety Response
This is the first line of defense our nervous system triggers when it senses immediate danger. Whether the threat is physical, emotional, or social, the threat detection and protection response kicks in swiftly. This response is fueled by our sympathetic nervous system, which activates the fight, flight, or freeze reaction.
In this state, our focus narrows, scanning for danger, preparing to either confront or escape it. This is an autonomic and survival-driven reaction. It’s fast, instinctual, and critical when facing clear and present danger. In times of political unrest, social instability, or interpersonal conflict, this response can surge, leaving us hypervigilant, distrustful, or emotionally shut down.
While necessary in truly dangerous moments, living in a constant state of threat detection can wear us down, both individually and collectively. It can erode our sense of connection with others, as we become isolated in survival mode. In the context of increasing divisiveness, the rise of this response may push people further into isolation, suspicion, or aggression, compounding societal fractures.
Befriend and Tend: Our Proactive Safety Response
In contrast, the befriend and tend response offers a relational and proactive strategy for navigating danger. Instead of isolating ourselves in survival mode, we turn toward connection and community. This response, mediated by the parasympathetic nervous system (specifically the vagus nerve), encourages us to reach out, nurture, and protect through relationships.
Befriending and tending to others allows us to feel safe not through confrontation or withdrawal but through the power of collective care. This response is about gathering strength in numbers, offering and receiving support, and creating safety through bonding. It’s seen in community movements, caregiving, and moments where mutual aid and collaboration overcome division.
In times of widespread fear and instability, leaning into this strategy can build resilience—not just for individuals but for communities as a whole. It reminds us that survival doesn’t always mean standing alone or being on the defensive; it can also mean creating networks of care, building bridges, and resisting the forces of fear through solidarity.
Choosing Our Safety Strategy Wisely
Both threat detection and protection and befriend and tend are adaptive strategies rooted in how our nervous systems function. But the key is choosing which strategy to employ, depending on the situation. There are times when we need to defend ourselves or set boundaries—whether to protect our rights, our dignity, or our safety. However, there are also moments when it’s more powerful to turn toward others, fostering connection, cooperation, and mutual support.
As we face the uncertainty of another political cycle, we must ask ourselves which response serves us—and those around us—best. Living in a constant state of threat detection can damage our relationships, push us further into ideological silos, and make us feel powerless. On the other hand, adopting a befriend and tend approach offers a path toward resilience through connection, where our power lies in solidarity, shared values, and the collective pursuit of safety and well-being.
When people are afraid and divided, as we are now, fostering communities of care and connection is not just a choice—it’s an act of resistance against fear and disconnection. It’s a mindful strategy to counter the divisiveness that threatens to tear us apart. Choosing to befriend and tend, especially in times of great uncertainty, is how we create the world we want to live in—one where we’re not just surviving but thriving together.
Creating Safety in Community
As fear grows, it’s tempting to retreat into self-protection, letting our nervous systems take the lead in scanning for danger. But we also have the power to choose connection as a form of safety. As the future unfolds, we can decide to lean into relationships, building networks of trust and care that fortify us against the chaos and uncertainty.
By mindfully selecting strategies informed by IPNB, we can protect our own well-being while supporting the nervous systems of those around us, creating a culture of resilience instead of division. Now more than ever, we need to recognize that our strength lies in choosing connection over isolation, community over fear.
This post includes content generated by ChatGPT, a language model developed by OpenAI. The AI-generated content has been reviewed and edited for accuracy and relevance.
