Author Archives: Shay Seaborne, CPTSD

About Shay Seaborne, CPTSD

Shay Seaborne CPTSD teaches Relational Neuroscience for stress reduction, trauma recovery, and community building. Shay has studied the neurobiology of fear / trauma /PTSD since 2014 and Interpersonal Neurobiology (IPNB) since 2019. They write, speak, teach, and make art to convey their experiences as well as their understanding of the neurobiology of fear, trauma theory, Interpersonal Neurobiology concepts, and principles of trauma recovery. A native of Northern Virginia, Shay settled in Delaware to sail KALMAR NYCKEL, the state’s tall ship. But once they finally had mental health insurance, their life rapidly changed. The standard treatment for PTSD nearly killed them. The psychiatric abuse began a cascade of negative medical encounters that repeatedly caused additional harm and the development of severe Medical PTSD. Shay wishes everyone could recognize that "mental health problems" are symptoms of dysregulation, our mainstream culture is neuro-negative, and we can heal ourselves and each other through awareness, understanding, and safe connection.

What Every Sex Abuse Story Has in Common: The Patterns That Protect Predators

Here is a very short list of the most common denominators in sex abuse and trafficking stories, grounded in lived experience, trauma research, and systemic patterns: 1. Power imbalance. The abuser holds more social, economic, institutional, or physical power than … Continue reading →

Posted in Accountability | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Gynecology’s Outrageously Dirty Secret:  Medicalized Female Genital Mutilation

Modern gynecology grew from violent roots. J. Marion Sims, celebrated by some as the “father of gynecology,” performed repeated surgeries on enslaved Black women in the 1840s without anesthesia or consent. He justified it by falsely claiming they didn’t feel … Continue reading →

Posted in Abuse | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Trauma in a White Coat: Why Survivors Are Blamed and Predators Protected

The most dangerous predator is not the stranger in a dark alley, but the familiar one in a white coat, protected by institutional walls, bureaucratic scripts, and a system trained to look the other way. Medical institutions, licensing boards, and … Continue reading →

Posted in Healthcare, Predators | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

“You Can’t Count on Anything”: The Birthday Dinner I Never Forgot

On my twenty-fifth birthday, my father took me out to dinner, just the two of us. That had never happened before. He insisted I order the Oysters Rockefeller. I had never had them. They were incredible. I remember sitting there … Continue reading →

Posted in Abuse | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

“Isn’t That How It Works?”

One of my doctors was telling me about his path into medicine. He attended a highly prestigious private school. He went on to say that there, he met a mentor who connected him with someone at Georgetown University. That relationship … Continue reading →

Posted in Relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

“How Would You Like to Proceed?”: The Role of Agency in Safe Medicine

A recent visit to my dermatologist inspired me to write about the relationship between safety and agency. We’d already had four appointments before this visit. She always asked permission before touching me. Every time, she explained what she was doing … Continue reading →

Posted in Healthcare | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Bystander Complicity: An IPNB View

From an Interpersonal Neurobiology (IPNB) perspective, the nervous system operates relationally, meaning that safety, trust, and connection are deeply shaped by social environments and relationships. Bystanders who witness abuse but fail to intervene may experience internal conflicts between their own … Continue reading →

Posted in Abuse | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Noticing Safety in the Small Moments We Overlook

Walking home from the community garden, I saw a young man coming toward me on my street. It was Independence Day weekend and there was a local event happening nearby, so there were more people around than usual, including people … Continue reading →

Posted in Community | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The Mental Illness industry: It Ain’t About Health or Care

The mental illness industry does not exist to heal people. It was largely built by Gilded Age industrialists to control the population, keep people functioning as workers, and pathologize suffering caused by systemic conditions. Instead of recognizing distress as a … Continue reading →

Posted in Mental Health | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Resilience Isn’t Solo: The Neurobiology of Support

A recent visit with a new healthcare practitioner had a significantly negative impact. She was so out of sorts that she could not appropriately connect. That meant she could not take in what I said or understand what I needed. … Continue reading →

Posted in Neurobiology | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment